During the Pennsylvania Democratic Primary, my brother-in-law showed up to vote and got turned away because they said he wasn’t a member of the Democratic Party (which is required to vote in the PA Primary). When he pushed the issue they said he could vote if he was positive of his status, but if it turned out not to be true, he could be charged with voter fraud. So, he walked away because he was simply not sure if he registered incorrectly or if some mistake had been made. And this is after I heard multiple stories of staunch Republicans who had changed their Pennsylvania registration simply to vote against Barack Obama.

And of course, now we are hearing about “Operation Chaos” sponsored by Rush Limbaugh where he urged Republicans to vote for Clinton simply to “bloody up” Obama before November. But now he says that they should stop because he thinks Obama is the weaker candidate. Strange how things change all of a sudden. Clearly he was trying to do two things… get Hillary support because he obviously thinks she is truly the weaker candidate against McCain — and bloody up Obama (as he said).

Is it voter fraud? No. But is it so unethical that I want to shake his supporters into some sort of Awakening moment (catch this ball!)? Isn’t this the party of the “true patriots?” People who accuse Democrats of being unpatriotic simply because they might question the patriotic value of something called the Patriot Act (”seriously how unpatriotic could it be? it’s called the PATRIOT ACT. fox news said so.”). People who accuse the Democrats of being unpatriotic because they question the Bush Administration’s tactics in a war of choice. And I’m sure they have flags hanging and ribbon magnets on their car and think Obama is suspect because he doesn’t wear a lapel pin. And then they go and interfere with the results of our democratic elections. True patriots, indeed.

I could get angrier if it weren’t for the fact that … all this interference? It means the extremists in the Republican Party have jumped the shark.

After this devastating cyclone, Laura Bush blasted the Myanmar goverment for “the junta’s failure to meet its people’s basic needs.”

Speaking about 9/11:

JERRY FALWELL: The ACLU’s got to take a lot of blame for this.

PAT ROBERTSON: Well, yes.

JERRY FALWELL: And, I know that I’ll hear from them for this. But, throwing God out successfully with the help of the federal court system, throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools. The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way - all of them who have tried to secularize America - I point the finger in their face and say “you helped this happen.”

PAT ROBERTSON: Well, I totally concur, and the problem is we have adopted that agenda at the highest levels of our government. And so we’re responsible as a free society for what the top people do. And, the top people, of course, is the court system.

And some other Jerry Falwell gems:

“AIDS is not just God’s punishment for homosexuals; it is God’s punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals.”

“The Jews are returning to their land of unbelief. They are spiritually blind and desperately in need of their Messiah and Savior.”

And our beloved Billy Graham’s little beauty:

“I go and I keep friends with [Abe] Rosenthal at the New York Times and people of that sort, you know. And all — I mean, not all the Jews, but a lot of the Jews are great friends of mine, they swarm around me and are friendly to me because they know that I’m friendly with Israel. But they don’t know how I really feel about what they are doing to this country. And I have no power, no way to handle them, but I would stand up if under proper circumstances.”

When I heard about Hillary lining up with McCain on the “gas tax vacation,” my stomach literally started to turn. It is such an absolutely idiotic solution that even the Bush Administration disagrees. That takes a lot for an administration full of idiots. I read yesterday that suspending the gas tax would save the average American $30 over the course of the summer. $30. And no talk about reducing consumption. Just continue on your ridiculous path of ultra consumption and continue to bury your head in the sand about the repercussions and the state of this nation. When I think we cannot get any dumber as a nation, we go and illustrate that we can. Oh yes, we can get so much dumber. And that is a scary place to be.

Thomas Friedman says it much better than I do…

And if I may, can I please urge you to donate to the Obama Campaign today? We are down to the wire on this. We are so desperate for an actual intelligent leader in this country. One who can say the less popular thing — because it is the right thing. As evidenced by his stand on this “gas tax vacation.” Seriously with $30 extra bucks in your pocket, that’s going to be the only vacation you get all year. Oops, I forgot about the “Stimulus Package,” where we get some extra coin to stimulate… China’s economy.

While we move to a new version of WordPress and attempt to pretty it all up, please be advised that there will be lots of little messes around. And don’t be surprised when you find a content field that says something to the effect of “insert your content here.” If you’re lucky, sometime soon I might actually update my copyright date from 2006.

The WP digs deeper on the story of BPA and its toxicity… And it finds that the main source of research about the toxicity of BPA (and thus the FDA deeming it safe) has come from…. any guesses? The industry itself!

We need to wake up and realize that industry involvement in research, policy, and regulation is not in our best interest … (think about Monsanto and milk labeling or about our VP and his closed door meetings with energy companies to form energy policy — how’s that been working out for us? is gas $4 a gallon yet?)

No one is looking out for us. So I will continue to go it alone and be my own source of research. Besides I like funding myself.

A while back, on a post related to The Omnivore’s Dilemma, a commenter mentioned that she would not be surprised if life expectancies began to decline because of our massive chemical exposure and western diets.  Well, here we go… life expectancies declining — especially among poor women in Southern Virginia (from 83 yrs in 1984 to 78 yrs in 1999).  Read The Washington Post article here.  There is absolutely no mystery in my mind:  the western lifestyle is to blame.  Michael Pollan goes into more detail about these health issues in In Defense of Food.  These medical researchers would be well-served to start reading.

My husband was telling me last evening that our university’s student newspaper had an article about Hillary and Barack supporters. And apparently, many were saying that they had no clue how they would vote for the other candidate if theirs didn’t get the nomination. So (as all good-intentioned, college-aged CHILDREN would do), they have decided to vote for John McCain if their side isn’t successful. Quotes about things like “how could I vote for someone who I disagree with so completely?”

(Screaming loudly)

This led us down the path of an evening’s worth of political discussion, with Crosby Still and Nash in the background as an official soundtrack. And the lyin’ politicians are rolling in the profits they reap…

We weaved our way through this democratic primary mess and all that I am left with is 1) that I am not sure how, as a nation, we could be so absolutely stupid to elect another Republican after what we have been through in the last eight years, 2) that I won’t be surprised if we are that stupid (because hell we elected GW twice despite the fact that he and his administration are mental midgets), 3) that I may be researching Canadian citizenship AGAIN (with much more fervor now that I have a son), and 4) that I am not sure I can even get involved in canvassing or yard signs or rallies because I am so afraid of the mental fallout if the other side wins.

And by “the other side,” I mean JOHN MCCAIN you fools! (or as my husband likes to call him, Old Walnuts McCain). You see, he is the other side. He is the one your ideals don’t match up with.

Please, please, please. First of all, let’s remember that Hillary’s baggage has been discussed ad infinitum and is thus considered very boring by our establishment and press. Barack’s baggage is new and exciting! These are not issues — these “did you serve on a board with some radical Santa Claus hater?” questions. But beyond this, their platforms are similar. The only kid doing his own thing (and by kid, I mean not a kid) is McCain. You are voting on personality and vision for changing the maybe irreparable damage of the last eight years.

Damage that has led us to recession and who knows how much worse, damage that has us fighting two wars (one necessary, one absolutely not), damage that puts us eight years further down the path of global warming (while they said it simply didn’t exist… tell the farmers in Australia that right now.), damage that has led us to a broken health care system, a broken education system (cute slogan, NCLB, but the program fucking sucks.), a broken image around the world, a broken food and drug system. I could go on.

So, please just don’t vote for McCain. I beg of you.

(The above list reminds me of a New Rules piece by Bill Maher that I posted back in 2005. Thought I’d put it below for us to revisit….) (more…)

Even if you can’t recycle it. I’m convinced more than ever that we should not be using plastic to store food. The government is finally coming around to the idea that BPA is dangerous. And considering all the other things in plastics (like phthalates), it just makes me think that we have to find a new way. I have switched all my food storage to glass pyrex dishes with plastic lids. I only occasionally put dry goods in plastic containers. I never microwave plastic or reuse it for food storage (even though I really want to with those yogurt containers that our town doesn’t recycle). I even send the pyrex in my daughter’s packed lunch. But where I am increasingly concerned are the vast amounts of plastic in grocery store (and even my farm share) items. Yogurt. My grass fed beef. Organic cottage cheese. Everything comes in plastic. And from what I know, the higher fat items tend to absorb the nasty chemicals more (meat, yogurt, etc.).

So where do I go now? I think I will tell my CSA meat lady that I want all my steaks and meat wrapped in butcher paper. But where do I find yogurt and sour cream in glass? WTF. Maybe I’ll buy a yogurt maker.

And if there are any Steves from the plastic industry reading this, yes, I realize these are all different kinds of plastic and they don’t all contain BPA. Yadda, yadda, yadda. It doesn’t make me change my opinion.

On update:  It is now reported that Canada will label BPA as toxic, and may ban its use in food containers 

Also know as the amount of time it took my daughter (age 6) to ask “are my legs too big up here?”

And strangely enough, it is also the day that I find an item on my to-do list for tomorrow which says, “Oxygenate the sea monkeys.”

This parenting?  It’s hard, strange shit.

Sorry for my massive absence.  I have sort of been relishing in living life outside of my computer lately.  And boy am I ever productive without this hunk of plasticized metal on my lap. Laundry gets folded (and put away!), closets get cleaned out (OK, so I still have the bags for Goodwill sitting on my floor), and I don’t get nearly as stressed as when I am reading CNN articles about superbugs and war and famine and protest.

But I am back for a moment.  And I read this on CNN.  But it wasn’t about drug resistant Staph or nothin’.  So apparently, as we all know, Hillary had a couple of “misspeaks” about the Bosnia thing.  OK. So, basically who cares.  But now she and Bill are bickering back and forth about the fact that neither of them remember shit about the situation.  I can hear the argument now.  Seems to me if I were them, I would stop talking about this and stop reminding people that your memory is not what it used to be.  Also seems to me that if we are worried about the Commander in Chief getting a call at 3AM, it might be nice if they remembered what they had for breakfast that morning.

Have you ever vomited all through the night by the light of the silvery moon? While your husband was in Florida (work related, at least)? With two kids waking up for the day one hour after your last vomiting session? And then had the girl develop a 102 degree fever and cough the next day while you feel like you have been hit by a truck, and while your husband is still in Florida? All the while with the little man feeling rosy and chipper and wanting to nurse and play and climb all over you?

And then have your husband nearly die coming into your rinky dink airport in 70 MPH winds — so bad that they had to divert to Baltimore (according to the pilot he ran the exact simulation nearly 50 times and they crashed about half of the time) — and then die again when Delta tells them they are getting a bus home but then decides to pile everyone into Baltimore city cabs (a nearly four hour drive home in the middle of the night through wind and snow and a nodding off cabby). Such a terrible return trip that my husband and my savior (the man who was going to entertain the kids and let me lie quietly in my bed — what any sick person should be allowed to do) couldn’t function the next day at all and needed vast quantities of sleep.

Um, if you haven’t done all that, you have not lived.

Thankfully, I am feeling back to normal — but the little lady’s fever and cough marches on. So we are embarking on Day 5 of being housebound, sick, and cranky. And guess what? It’s Spring Break this week! Doesn’t it feel like it? I am going to attempt to load up everyone for a walk — even if I have to drag the little lady kicking and screaming and clutching her Tylenol.

So, as has been the theme this month, here’s a great recipe to go along with the vomiting. The little lady was begging for waffles this morning and I have no ability to say no when someone isn’t feeling well. So, here you go: Whole Wheat Belgian Waffles (adapted from How to Cook Everything by Mark Bittman). These were incredibly good, crispy on the outside, and very tender (and not at all “whole wheaty”). And I am not sure why I have never thought of this before, but we mixed some melted butter into some real maple syrup to put on top. Usually, we keep the butter and syrup separate, but this method was delicious!

Whole Wheat Belgian Waffles

2 cups whole wheat pastry flour (very important to use the pastry flour)
1/2 tsp. sea salt
2 tbsp. sugar
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 1/2 cups organic whole milk yogurt
1/4 cup organic milk
2 eggs, separated
4 tbsp. melted butter
2 tsp. vanilla extract

2 tbsp. melted butter
4 tbsp. real maple syrup, warmed slightly

1. Mix the flour, salt, sugar, and baking soda in a large bowl.

2. Whisk together the yogurt, milk, two egg yolks, melted butter, and vanilla in a separate small bowl. Stir into the dry ingredients.

3. Brush a waffle iron with a bit of canola oil and preheat.

4. Beat the egg whites until they hold moderately soft peaks. I like to do this by hand, as I think it justifies the fact that I will be eating a waffle quite soon. Fold the beaten egg whites gently into the waffle batter in the large bowl.

5. Put several spoonfuls of the waffle batter into your waffle iron (based on the size of your iron) and cook until brown and crispy, according to your waffle iron’s instructions. This usually takes about 3-5 minutes.

6. Stir melted butter into maple syrup and serve with cooked waffles.

As a parent of any six year old will tell you, you are forced to talk about paper conservation a lot. Reams of paper leave the printer with pictures of Strawberry Shortcake or Webkinz adoption certificates printed on them. Some are destined for art projects. Some are destined for the trash. So we talk a lot about not wasting paper (especially when Daddy is getting ready for a trip and needs to print a boarding pass and itinerary).

And we always try to appeal to her emotional side by telling her that paper comes from trees — trees that must be cut down, never to see a day in the forest again. “Isn’t that sad? Trees that can’t be with their friends any more? All because you need to have ten copies of Scruffy’s adoption certificate?” (OK, maybe I wasn’t that harsh.) But by the way, we generally use manipulation to solve all of our parenting dilemmas.

So. As we were leaving the little lady’s school yesterday, she noticed that they had cut down a huge tree — leaving only a flattened stump in its place. She was sort of dumbfounded by the sight of it along with all the sawdust everywhere and asked, “Mommy, what’s that?”

“Well honey, that’s the stump of a tree they must have had to cut down.”

And without missing a beat, she says: “But Mommy, where’s all the paper?”

—————–

Oh the little man these days. At 18 months, his vocabulary is increasing by leaps and bounds. And because I know it’s so interesting (but more for my own failing memory), here’s a sample…

-Mommy, Daddy, Sissy and all the grandparents names (JoJo, Pa, Nanny, Boppy)
-Go? (as in, where’d they go? but always with his hand turned up and thumb touching his cheek)
-No (the answer to every question posed to him)
-Dagung (balloon)
-Dadnum (vacuum)
-Chitty Chat (kitty cat)
-Docky (doggy), which is very different from…
-Ducky (which goes “kak, kak”)
-Ceetsa (pizza)
-Chochee (pacifier)
-Tweeee! (he loves trees, by the way, almost as much as he loves…)
-Cah! (cars, and yes he says it for each one in the grocery store parking lot)
-Choo Choo (honestly, what did kids even talk about before choo choo’s were invented?)
-Shashun (napkin, as if in Sissy has it, I want one too!)
-Aye, Aye (Night Night)
-DOWN! (as in, get me out of this crib or highchair immediately you fool!)

So, his most recent revelation is that he can combine two words together. For example, Daddy Cah (means look, there’s Daddy’s car) and Mommy Twee (means Mommy come sit by the window and let’s look at the trees) and Dadnum Go? (means where’d you put that vacuum cleaner?) and Nanny Go?, Boppy Go?, JoJo Go?, Pa Go? (means where’d all my grandparents go? … and the answer is, according to sissy, “they’re in Florida livin’ the life!”) and Choochee down (means I’m going to put my pacifier down Mommy — you know, so I can eat my lunch. Is that cool?)

But as an 18 month old who is still nursing (and loving it more than ever, I hesitate to report), his best two word combination has to be:

“Mommy, teat.”

Which means time to eat, beeatch.

All this talk of CSAs taking food out of the mouths of third world countries? Humph. The Washington Post makes me think it must not be true. Apparently it has more to do with soaring food and fuel costs, as well as growing markets in India and China. So, actually, it might be your E85 powered Chevy Tahoe that’s taking food from third world people … but so far it’s not my CSA.

But let me get this straight… food shortages because of soaring costs?

Makes me damn happy to be funding local agriculture.

1. It is of no help to your wife if you take the trash out and fail to replace the bag liner in the can. Probably less help than if you don’t take it out at all. And you will invoke a string of “shit, fuck, damns” when your wife has a handful of wet chicken packaging that she is attempting to throw in there (around the baby proofing lock) and she finds no liner.

2. It is of no help to your country if you continue to investigate steroids (and now perjury) in Major League Baseball. Not sure when someone is going to ask them what the hell they are trying to accomplish in a time of war, terrorism, a health care system that our own government projects will require us to spend $1 of our every $5 on it within 10 years, the sub-prime mortgage crisis, inflation, recession (but we aren’t allowed to call it that), melting polar ice caps, a food infrastructure that is beyond broken and recalling millions of pounds of ground beef, chemicals bombarding us from every direction causing things all the way from asthma and lower IQ’s among urban children (pollution) to breast cancer in men (parabens? EMFs?), the huge increase in children’s food allergies, lead chew toys for our kids… Do I need to continue? For crying out loud, Free Roger Clemens!

3. It is not equitable to think that you need a poker club if your wife has a book club. First, I’ve never even seen any of you play poker — and at least I know how to read (actually I’m quite proficient). And B, when you stay home with two young children for day upon day cleaning up throw up/diarrhea, attempting to put snow clothes on a one year old, making dinner while said one year old wedges his standing self into your crotch area, all the while attempting to listen and watch a 6 year old at all times (because if a six year old jumps really high and then jumps and throws a ball and then catches that ball at the same time, if this all happens and a Mommy isn’t watching, has it ever really occurred? Absolutely not. “Mommy, watch! Mommy, listen! No, Mommy your eyes weren’t really watching!”) When you can do that for one week solid (and we’ll go to work in your place), that’s when you deserve a poker club.

4. It is not helpful to sweep the kitchen floor into a little pile and then not clean up the pile — as if you are leaving evidence of your helpfulness. (I should add that this has never happened to me, but it has been reported to me that one man I know does this. Strange.)

5. It is never OK to complain about what’s for dinner. Unless, of course, you are cooking the dinner. Just don’t do it. Or do it with extreme caution.

6. It is helpful to actually communicate with the person on the other end. For example, if your old high school friend calls and tells you he and his wife had a baby — find out the sex, the name, and how much the kid weighs. However funny it may seem to you, we are not interested in hearing you rehash the details of the time at Chucky’s bachelor party when someone punched that dude — especially if the conversation yields no information that we can wrap our female minds around.

7. It should be clear that when she says “she doesn’t feel like giving the kids a bath tonight,” that she is not looking for you to respond by telling her to skip bathing the dirt-crusted children. She wants you to offer to give them a bath.

8. It is not advisable to question or second guess your wife on pretty much anything. She knows the complicated details behind why you need a new high chair, why that stroller doesn’t work for this situation, why she needs to go to the drug store before the grocery store — and definitely before she picks up her daughter at school (what, are you that stupid?), and why you always dust before you vacuum. Don’t second guess, that is, unless you want to hear about the complicated 28 point matrix of why she is doing what she is doing. Please, just trust her. You really don’t want to know all the details she is managing in her head.